Thoughts on a Monday

March snow, it's inevitable in Utah

My "omelette"

I'm sitting here, eating the breakfast I made, (which was supposed to be an omelette, but turned into scrambled eggs with ham and jalapenos -- which, by the way, I had to text my mom to ask her how to tell when jalapenos are bad.)  and I started thinking. I haven't touched my blog in almost two years. It has just been this thing that I get emails about once in awhile. I thought recently about how I haven't written in so long. Then I had to dive into why I stopped writing. Is it because I got bored? Or is it because I was afraid of being boring? I would spend hours reading through other's blogs, clicking links that would take me to another one, and another one, and another one. I would think "these people have such entertaining lives. Their pictures are flawless and their entire page is gorgeous.
Before I stopped writing, a friend of mine revamped my blog and made it look much better than anything I could try to do. The fact is, I'm terrible at computers. Graphic design, and codes, and editing. It's just not my thing.
So, I start to feel a little embarrassed of my own silly blog. I would take outfit photos, but they seemed so "meh".

And then after two years and some serious yearning for expression, I realized: who. fucking. cares? This is my blog. This is my space. My voice needs to escape because that is one way I can release my stress and anxiety.

Here's the thing: I love fashion. I don't get paid to express my love of fashion. But I'm gonna.
I love writing. I'm gonna.
I have a voice, and I'm going to use it. Or in this case, type it.

My life is not glamorous, I work in retail for crying out loud. But I have things to say, and finally I can stop caring about comparing myself to others. It may have taken me 20 something years to accept that, but here it is. I don't care if you think I'm boring, I don't care if you subscribe, or comment, or laugh, or think. This is going to be my place. I can be as silly, or weird, or deep as I want to be. I miss the feeling of getting it all out there.

So, stay tuned. Or don't.
It's gonna happen.

Dis-appointment

Well, the bad news is: I went into my dentist appointment today and it turns out that my bridge came out the wrong tint. It didn't match any of my other teeth so it stuck out like a sore thumb when he held it up. He called the lab where the bridge was made to see if there was anything else they could do to help me out.

The good news is: Yes I will be able to get a better bridge made that will be different materiel so it doesn't turn out such an awkward color.

I won't lie, finding out that it wasn't completely happening today really disappointed me. I got emotional laying there without my beautiful new tooth. After talking about it for a few minutes I decided that there was no reason to be upset. It's going to happen. Just not today.
I'm grateful that my dentist was willing to help me find the best option and not just glue the stupid discolored one in. I decided to have him bond this one into place just to last me a few weeks. {I really don't want to put that damn retainer back in}
On Monday I'll go get a new impression made and in a few weeks I'll finally have this bridge. Finally.

In other news: tonight was my sisters rehearsal dinner and the entire party almost got blown away by the wind. It was crazy!

Dress: Wet Seal
Sandals: Forever Young Shoes

Lately

Top: Charlotte Russe
Skirt: Thrifted (Plato's Closet)
Shoes: Forever Young
Tights: Wet Seal

Well, since the weather froze over, I survived another holiday in retail and it became a new year not a whole lot in my life has changed.
Except, as luck would have it, I was able to snag myself a full time job! Hooray!! It's a call center, nothing extremely glamorous, but I had gotten in inside my head that I was going to spend the rest of my life doing nothing but retail. Getting this job has actually helped my self esteem when it comes to my range of work experience. I was hired on as a temp, but even if I do get laid off I'm confidant enough to have a fuller resume to help me find something else. Currently, I'm really enjoying this job. It's new, different, challenging, something I've been hoping to stumble on. Did I mention it's full time? I couldn't be more thrilled to finally have 40 hours of a set schedule every single week!

Other than my job news Taran and I have been having a pretty normal, boring married couple life. We eat a lot of breakfast burritos and watch a lot of tv series. (Supernatural, Breaking Bad, The Vampire Diaries, etc etc) Our puppies are their normal playful selves, they crack us up constantly with their funny personalities. 

I'm mostly focusing on getting my life into a nice routine. It's definitely a lot easier to be a grown up when you have life under control. Work, bills, friends, family, dates, it can be overwhelming when you're still new at the domestic life. I've gotten better at cooking, I've learned to clean up after myself more often and I'm doing my best daily to be a good wife, not just for Taran but for me. I'm reaching that point where I'm happy with things, instead of feeling like I can't keep my head above water. I guess people do say the first year of marriage is the hardest, which I can understand. We're getting the hang of each other, of marriage. I'm pleased with the direction we are headed in.

 

One

Hello, yes it's me. Remember when I used to actually post on this blog?
Here's the thing, I've had a pretty busy few months. I've had things come up that were a little more important that blogging. On top of that I go through phases where I feel like my life is so uninteresting and not worth blogging about. I've had to tell myself multiple times that I have a lot to talk about besides my daily life and this blog doesn't have to be strictly daily life updates.
On that note, I will dive into a post sometime this week to rehash what Taran and I have been up to for the past couple of months. Today I'm writing about something else.

This weekend Taran and I celebrated our first anniversary. It's insane to me that I can say "I've been married for a year". We're past the newlywed stage, we have moved onto the actual stage of 'The Griffith's'. I've had a year of being somebodies wife. No longer a fiance, a girlfriend or "that girl from math class that I like-like".
Marriage is a crazy, phenomenal constant uphill battle. It's definitely not easy, but it's something that is so fulfilling every single day that I look forward to improving and growing.
As you may know Taran and I opted for a simple wedding at the courthouse in favor of something elaborate that required a lot of planning. Now that a year has gone by I am still incredibly glad that I made that choice.

We were lacking in the finances to do anything too extravagant to celebrate this year, however money doesn't matter when you're in the company of someone you love. Sound cheesy? It's true. I had such a fun weekend and I think we may have a couple traditions started that I'm looking forward to continuing.
We spent the day (March 1st) down in the city where we got married. Since we were there for the wedding they've built so many different things. The day we were there the previous year we had to avoid construction to get our wedding pictures (which turned out amazing anyway.) and they really only had built a restaurant and movie theater. We thought it would be a fun tradition to go have dinner at the same restaurant we went to last year. It was a great choice because the food was delicious!
After dinner we visited the little fountain where our pictures were taken and had someone snap a new picture in the same spot.

 We spent some time wandering around the mall, shops with giant candy bars and some with wall to wall accessories (my dream!)
Once it got dark we decided to head home for some wine and Breaking Bad. (Which we finished this weekend by the way...amazing? Amazing. I think I might have ptsd from that ending...I keep thinking about it.)
On our wedding night we stayed at a really nice hotel where they gave us a bottle of wine for free. The hotel also had a free wine tasting in the lobby that night and we had plenty of it. When we got home we decided to hold off on cracking open our free bottle and to save it for our one year since we didn't have the traditional first layer of cake or anything like that. We were nervous about the quality of the wine, considering we've never saved a bottle before, so we stopped and bought a couple fresh bottles just in case. It ended up tasting great though and it was nice to toast our one year with our wedding night gift.

Sunday we spent the day in pajamas finishing up Breaking Bad and simply enjoying each others company. I had such a great time with my husband. I'm truly so lucky I snagged that one, he's the best.
Speaking of, did you check out my gorgeous anniversary gift in the photo above?
 I've had my eye on those necklaces for awhile now and he remembered! I'm in love, it's beautiful!
Thrilled to have been married to that stud for a year. To many many many more!!

Well hello.

Everything is Wet Seal.

I know I don't have the most eventful, exciting life but I do enjoy blogging and I know there are some people who follow this blog.
So, I'm sorry for being MIA the past few months. My blog has been under construction, a friend of mine is giving it a makeover for me. While she's been doing that I've been pretty busy myself. Since my last post I ended up getting a second job to help us more with finances. When I first started I was working 12 hour days and I was exhausted.
Now things are a little more stable and my schedules are working around each other, so I feel a lot better. So far it's definitely helped having that extra paycheck.

Hopefully now I'll have some time to blog again too, and I will put up some photos of our house since we've decorated a lot more now!

Makeovers

Sorry I've been MIA for the past few weeks. I've had a lot going on and haven't had a chance to really sit down and blog.
So much is changing in my life and it's definitely all for the better!
Taran and I have started redecorating our house, it's a pain but worth it once we see a finished room. So far we have our bedroom done and the living room done. Next we'll be ripping up carpet and starting the dining room. It's hard work, and not cheap especially in between bills. I think it's all turning out very nicely though and I can't wait to have everything finished so it feels 100% like ours.

Just needs some decorations!

Another big makeover that is happening is with my work. Our store got chosen to be remodeled so last month we moved all our stuff into a temporary space and we'll be there until July 8th. The temp space is frustrating...there's no bathroom, a lot of the lighting doesn't work and it's very hot. I just have to remind myself that it'll all be worth it in the end when we see our brand new store. It's not forever and I'm grateful for that!

My cute coworkers and our empty store. This was after I left and everything was completely cleared out. So weird!!

Can't wait to see it finished!

Lastly; one other thing that is getting a makeover is myself. By that I mean, I need to get myself into shape and healthier. I've noticed my clothes are feeling a bit tight, and although I know I'm still a tiny girl, I want to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand. I'm getting older and I want to be healthy! I got myself a gym membership and started going to a few Zumba classes. It's hard to get motivated every day, especially when you haven't worked out like....ever, but I'm trying! This is something for me and I think it'll help me with not just my body, but my mind too. I have depression, and since my grandma passed it's only gotten worse. Instead of letting it take over me I want to turn it around into something positive and uplifting for myself.

So to sum up, life is pretty good right now. I'm excited for the end results of all this hard work everyone is putting in to everything. My husband with the house, the construction workers with my store...even myself.
More updates soon!

pocahontas

Everything: Wet Seal :)

Never in my life did I think I would own a fur vest, but when I saw this one I fell in love and I'm so glad I got it!
Taran told me my outfit reminded him of Pocahontas, and it was hard not to laugh while he was taking my picture.

Speaking of Taran.....he officially moved in today! Yay for cohabitation! :D

candles & card games

On Monday Taran and I went down to my grandma's house to celebrate her birthday. A few other family members came as well and we had pizza. We tried to find birthday candles for her cake but she doesn't have any in her house, so instead we took some candle sticks and stuck them in the cake. Whatever works right?
It was great to see her smiling and having a good time. She really deserves to have things around her that make her smile, because she deserves to be happy despite everything.

Last night Crystal, Jerrica and I had a girls night. I had such a good time hanging out with my best friends and just being our weird selves. We had some drinks, watched Pitch Perfect and played games {somehow we always end up playing In A Pickle, but it's so much fun I don't even care} I laugh so much when I'm with them and I don't have to worry about anything. I hope we still have our girl's nights when we're 30, 40...even 50!
When we woke up this morning we all decided to go have some breakfast. The snow was awful to drive in, and I literally looked like I rolled out of bed and went there {oh wait I kinda did, ha!} But it was a good end to a good night with them. I wish we got to see each other more often, but I'm grateful for the times we do get to hang out. And I know we'll start having more nights to hang out soon :)

A Big Life Update

So, I know it's been well over six months since I last posted on here. I kept thinking I wanted it to be a fashion blog, but I never ended up having the best quality of photos for it. Then I thought it could just be my personal blog but my life is not the most exciting one out here in the blogging world.
After thinking about it and being away for awhile I decided...who cares? This is my damn blog and it can be whatever I want it to be. Fashion, personal, silly, creative...whatever.
Updates are for me and the people who want to read them. Simple as that.

With that being said a lot has happened in life in the past, oh 7 or so months. I last blogged right before Taran and I were planning to house sit for my grandma, we ended up there for almost month. In that time I didn't have my own computer to blog from and I didn't end up coming all the way home {all the way...meaning, like, 15 minutes away} very often. I kinda forgot about the blog to be honest....
Summer was good, and okay...it's kind of hard to enjoy summer when your schedule is always conflicting. We didn't do much aside from go out for dessert on my birthday, the day after is mine and Taran's anniversary so for that we went to the zoo.

In early June I found out that my dad had been rushed to the hospital because he had a heart attack. It was pretty scary and I had to leave work to have my mom take me to see him. Luckily it was not as bad as it could have been and he was out of the hospital the next day. He's doing much better and has picked up a healthier lifestyle {aka he quit smoking. 7 months smoke free! Yay dad!}
We also found out that my grandma's cancer cell count went back up....summer wasn't the best season for us unfortunately.

I ended up getting a second job at another retail store, one that caters specifically to younger girls called Justice. It was nice working a lot between both jobs and getting some extra money. However, toward the end of June it was decided that it was time to leave my job at Charlotte Russe. I was sad to leave but I needed to part ways and find something new considering working two part time jobs wouldn't cut it for Taran and I financially. I ended up going back to work at my old job...Wet Seal. I always said I would never ever work there again, but when you need a job and you know the store manager, sometimes you need to give it a second chance. This time though, I wasn't working at the same store that I was at a couple years ago, I moved to a different mall where Steph got promoted as the store manager there. I got hired on as basically the same position I was in at Charlotte, still part time but I was keeping my eye open for full time potential jobs.

I've been back at Wet Seal for about six months now and it's going really great. It feels a lot different than when I worked there previously. I feel like I have better control of things and the way they flow. We have a really great team who works well together and knows what we're doing. Also, I really enjoy being in a different store, a bigger store.
I'm still at Justice too, but I only work there about once every two weeks. I really like it there but I think with the circumstances I might have to leave soon...

Fall was a blur really...mostly working, spending time with Taran and the besties whenever I could. Halloween was a blast and Taran and I went as Dexter and Debra Morgan from the show Dexter. Taran looked awesome!
Also I got to see Circa Survive again and I met Anthony Green again! It was amazing. This band never fails to disappoint me and Anthony continues to be my idol.

The past few months have also flown by...working a lot because of the holiday season. I absolutely despise holiday mall hours. It's silly for us to be there 3 hours earlier than normal because people don't even come shopping that early. But now everything is back to normal and it's a huge relief. I enjoy the holidays but working in retail does make you a bit bitter toward it all.

A few weeks ago my grandma asked Taran and I to house sit again for her while she spent Christmas out of town with family. My mom and I sat down and talked about some things and it was decided that she was going to end up moving out to my grandma's house with her, and Taran and I would live together in this house. It stressed me out at first because my grandma's health is declining and I assumed the worst. She explained how it was mostly for the fact that our house we're in now is too small for 4 people to live in. Which is true, I get frustrated because it's so tiny and I can hear everything from my mom talking on the phone to my brothers fighting. It's a perfect house for 2 people, which is why it's perfect for Taran and I.
While we were house sitting we talked about how we were going to redecorate and repaint and what we were going to do with the house. For Christmas my dad and stepmom Tonya spoiled us with gifts for our home. A crock pot, a coffee maker, a vacuum...etc. I am so grateful because doing all that alone was a big stress maker.


As of last week we finalized everything {for the most part} and my mom is going to be moving her stuff asap, so she should be moved in by February 1st. Taran is going to spend the rest of January at home since he did pay some bills for things he uses there with his roommate. Then once my mom gets settled with her things, Taran will start moving in here with me.

It's overwhelming and exciting, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. Obviously it was inevitable because we are getting married, but it's happening so fast that it's shocking! I can't wait to start fixing it up how we want because it will be our house. Taran is thrilled and can't stop talking about certain things he wants to fix up/remodel. This house is very old so it needs lots of work, but it's our project we can work on together and I am so happy!

Life is starting to fall together, despite some things dragging me down such as the worry about my grandma, money, planning our wedding....I feel like this is a huge step in getting our lives started. Together.

Hoping to remember this blog and update more often. Maybe with outfit posts, maybe with life posts or maybe just random stuff!

Keep an eye out :)

Now for pictures....highlights of 2012:

Last day in Disneyland {technically still 2011 but whatever}; Vegas with Travis and Crystal...got to see Celine Dion live!; Anthony Green's solo tour, Trip to Fallon to see Randi with Crystal and Jerrica; my birthday celebration at The Melting Pot with my favorite people; went to a car show/fair with Taran, mom and my brothers

The girls from work and I all participated in the Color Run! It was so much fun; my coworker Harmony was in a pageant and we all went to cheer her on. She was great!; Celebrated the birthdays of my two besties in the world; saw Circa Survive and met Anthony Green!! Still excited about that; me and the girls Disneybound-ed for work on Halloween. I was Snow White and they went as Dopey and Grumpy; Travis, Crystal, Jerrica Brittan and I went to see The Scarlet Pimpernel. Amazing show, I love it.

 

Halloween! Taran made the perfect Dexter; Thanksgiving day spent with the love of my life; Randi came to visit and unfortunately she was so busy we didn't get a chance to get together. I did get to pop by and see her and little Ben before they left though! Miss those faces so much; my best friend Jerrica graduated from college with a bachelor degree in Journalism. She worked her butt off and I'm so happy for her; Taran showing off all our Christmas presents from my dad. Waffle maker, vacuum, crock pot, coffee pot....; my crazy coworkers leg wrestling at our work Christmas party. Ugly Sweaters, white elephant gifts, secret Santa gifts, we did it all :)