Bridge of Light

When I was in 8th grade I got my braces off after a year and a half of having them off. After they were taken off I was given a retainer to wear until I turned 18. The reason for the retainer was because one of my front teeth never grew in, so it had a false attached to it. I got told that when I was 18, after my teeth had finally settled permanently, I could get an implant. 

Well, I turned 18 seven years ago and I have yet to get an implant. The reason is simply because its insanely expensive. Since I have yet to scrounge up $3,000 for a tooth I've had to stick to the retainer since 8th grade. 

That's twelve years.

Needless to say I've been very self conscious about it for those past twelve years. I don't look my age because all you see is metal when I smile. I hate it, but at the same time I won't go out in public without it because I don't have a tooth!

All I've ever heard about is the implant. In the last twelve years of wearing this stupid retainer nobody ever told me about a Maryland bridge.

Until I got my root canal.

When I spoke to this new dentist he gave me multiple options instead of the implant. For the first time I actually heard of something other than what I was stuck with.

We discussed the pros and cons of the bridge and came to the decision that it would be the best option for me until I can afford the actual permanent implant. 

For the remainder of my appointment he took a mold of my teeth and set up the time for me to come back. It was supposed to be a two week process for the bridge to be made so they scheduled me 3 weeks away so that it would be 100% ready for me.

Yesterday I got a phone call saying it was done early. I'm going in tomorrow to get in put in.

I don't know if anyone really understands what this is like but I am so unbelievably excited. This is something that has held me back and dented my confidence since I was 13 years old. I've hate smiling, I've hated telling people why I still wear a retainer, I've hated correcting people when they guess my age. It's been nothing but a pain and it's finally going to be gone tomorrow. 

 

Dress: Wet Seal
Hat: Wet Seal

Shoes: Forever Young

Ramones and floral

Today it was hot and windy. After I got off work I didn't even want to do anything but just lie down. Not sure why I'm so tired today because I got about 9 hours of sleep, but I feel like I just want to go to bed and it's only 7:00.
I literally threw this outfit together in about 10 seconds. I like how it turned out considering my main focus was getting my little brother and myself to work on time.

Stella likes to model with me.

Top: Wet Seal
Skirt: Wet Seal
Shoes: Wet Seal
Necklace: Wet Seal
Earrings: Charlotte Russe

Booties and cookies

The problem with having a big butt is that it makes mini skirts extra mini. It's not too bad in the winter when I can wear tights, but wearing tights when it's 80 degrees outside is not an option. I ended up needing to put on a pair of shorts to go under this skirt because otherwise the world would have gotten a peep show all day.

I got to have a girls night with Crystal and Jerrica today. I made Root Beer Float cookies, Crystal brought pizza and we played Cards Against Humanity while watching America's Next Top Model reruns. I'm so glad we were able to plan it, I had a lot of fun. Those girls make me feel a lot better! It's so hard for us to get together nowadays what with all our weird schedules and the fact that we don't live down the street from each other anymore. I miss being able to have craft nights, or grab lunch, or go to the park whenever we wanted to. Being grown ups with careers and college and husbands makes life a lot more busy. They leave to go visit Randi on Saturday for the weekend in California. I'm pretty sad that I can't join them, but I simply couldn't budget it. Hopefully I can see her soon though, I really miss her.

Top: Thrifted
Vest/Skirt/Shoes: Wet Seal

Skirts and caps

Today my littlest step-sister graduated high school! It's so crazy that she is 18 years old, graduated, has her CNA certification and is getting married next year. I'm really proud of her.
Graduation ceremonies are pretty dang boring though, I remember sitting through mine but I don't remember a single speech. I think someone quoted Dr. Seuss? I think it's great to celebrate academic achievement, and to have the class valedictorian speak. It's just a lot to sit through. Especially when the building is sweltering hot.
Not to mention Mekaila's last name starts with a T so we had to sit through a whole list of A-S's that we don't even know. But hey, they're someone's kid! So, 'grats class of 2014!

Mekaila getting her diploma

I loved this outfit a lot. I had been looking everywhere for a tulle skirt that was calf length, with absolutely no luck. Because I refused to spend $40 + on it. I was searching online and found this adorable one on Ebay for only $10! I love it so much I want to buy another.

Top: Charlotte Russe
Skirt: Ebay
Shoes: Rue 21
Belt: Wet Seal

Shrunk

 Husband accidentally shrunk this shirt by drying it. I was pretty devastated because I love it {and it was only $5!}. Luckily I was able to tuck it into a skater skirt and you couldn't tell it was awkwardly shrunken.Taran learned his lesson with laundry and will no longer wash anything of mine unless it's underwear or sweats. Bless his heart, he felt really bad about the whole situation.

Hat: Wet Seal
Top: Cotton On
Skirt: Wet Seal
Shoes: Rue 21

exhausted.

Top: TJ Maxx | Cardigan/Jeans: Wet Seal | Boots/Earrings: Charlotte Russe

For the past 4 years I've been on sleeping pills, without them I haven't been able to sleep at all. It's miserable.
A couple weeks ago my prescription ran out and I needed to schedule an appointment with my doctor to get it filled. It was right before I left to go visit Randi in Fallon so I didn't get a chance to go, plus after talking with my mom she thought it might be a good idea for me to try and train my body to sleep on its own, and not be so dependent on pills.

That idea sucks. I am so tired and unable to feel well rested. I can get to sleep without them, but I don't sleep well and I hate it.
I. Am. Exhausted.

I just want to be able to have a full nights sleep without waking up on and off, without feeling like I'm barely asleep, without wanting to sleep allllll day.
Ugh.
Let's just say I'm not a happy camper and I'm starting to get really grumpy.

But, I'm unsure if I should get my prescription refilled or keep going on this way.
UGH.

pocahontas

Everything: Wet Seal :)

Never in my life did I think I would own a fur vest, but when I saw this one I fell in love and I'm so glad I got it!
Taran told me my outfit reminded him of Pocahontas, and it was hard not to laugh while he was taking my picture.

Speaking of Taran.....he officially moved in today! Yay for cohabitation! :D

milk & eggs

Top: TJ Maxx
Boots: Wet Seal

Today I got my first taste of what it's like to be an adult. Grocery shopping.
Obviously I've done it before but for certain things that I wanted, not needed. This time it was all on me and it was weird.
Hoping it gets easier and I learned to calm down over these silly things that give me anxiety. It's hard getting used to all these new things though, I'm really not used to it yet.

Hopefully Taran will be moving in this weekend so that's something to be excited about! Yay!

Ice Storm

Boots/Leggings: Wet Seal | Top: Gordman's | Necklace: Charlotte Russe

Today it rained pure ice all day long. I should have packed some ice skates with me to skate my way into the mall because walking in boots almost caused me to fall and bust my tailbone. The roads were awful too, I heard about so many accidents on the freeway all day long. When I got home I had to hold on to my fence to get up the driveway because it was pure ice. I stood on my back step snapping some pictures of the icicles hanging from the roof and I broke one off and threw it in the snow. At least I tried to throw it in the snow, but it was so frozen that the snow broke the icicle. That's how cold it is here in good ol' Utah right now. Ugh.

I am so tired of the freezing bitter cold, I'm ready for Spring warmth, longer days, less layers.